Because of delays caused by rainstorms and the impossibility of getting around on gumbo mud roads, the ranch where my husband works and has his cattle is still in the midst of branding calves. He is busy from dawn to dark gathering cattle a-horseback, sorting cattle, being part of the branding crew, and making sure mother cows and calves are “mothered up” in the summer pasture.
Yesterday, I helped where I could including with serving the big meal which follows each part of branding. It was an unusual Father’s Day for my husband, but he was doing what he loves where he loves to be, and he knows he is blessed with children and grandchildren who care deeply about him no matter what he does on that day.
A crew of hardworking ranch people worked together to complete a job amidst mutual efforts and frequent laughter. My husband roped calves with his usual expertise and took turns with handling the brands and other branding duties – allowing the younger men to do the “calf wrestling” which gets harder as one gets older. The riding and gathering part of the day involved using our son Josh’s horse Tucker, a beautiful big bay horse who was expertly trained by Josh, and also Josh’s saddle.
All that was missing from this perfect old west picture was Josh himself. He rode and worked with his dad for so many years, including a week before his sudden death. The ranchers of the area where he was living and operating his mechanics shop valued his help with riding and ranch events as much as the ranchers in this area where he grew up, and all of them assumed as we did that he would always be around to be part of things.
I tell this story because one thing people need to realize and honor about grief is that it is never “done” – and often a simple act or a simple sight, smell or sound brings a loved one back so strongly that we are catapulted back into memories and longing beyond description. We just have to realize that the pain would not come if the precious person and events had never been part of our lives. God’s blessings embrace both aspects. Praise Him!
I just want to continue to share ideas about grief and life with people who long as I do for comfort and understanding.