October 8, 2018
In my book, Walking at the Speed of Light, I emphasize over and over the importance of keeping in step with Jesus, in examining our motives and actions in the “light” of His life and words. As my mother used to say, “Sometimes easier said than done.”
Because I totally believe everything I wrote in that book and everything I confess faith in, that doesn’t mean that the actual following of those beliefs is either easy or totally consistent. One of the qualities which God has endowed many of us with is confidence, and sometimes confidence gets in the way of listening to Jesus’ quiet voice.
When my brother and I were young, we loved Fess Parker as Davy Crockett and were solidly struck by his motto of “Be sure you are right; then go ahead.” That motto sticks with me and gives rise to many actions approached confidently because they start with being sure I am right. The problem becomes being sure that the actions are God’s will, not just mine.
In the last several months, I got on the track of my will. Does that mean that everything I did was not according to God’s will, not in step with Jesus and His Light? No. It just means that the clarity of the Light can be obscured by a focus on my will and my confident decisions. As a result, I was “running around like a chicken with its head cut off,” as my grandma used to say.
Suddenly at the end of September, I realized that what I was being urged by God to do was to go home and stay there awhile. I had been in Europe, I had been around the state doing book signings, I had been in another state with old friends. All of this was good – which is a problem for the Christian. So many things are good – so how do we decipher what is Good related to the Light of the World, not just good in the total picture but good in the present timeline?
The answer was that I had overstepped my confidence and gotten so busy that I left out the quiet time to reflect and pray, read the Bible, and regulate my steps to His, as we need to do over and over. The realization brought me up short and sent me home. I can already feel my batteries being recharged. We cannot be lights for anyone else if our batteries are dead, if our relationship with Jesus is out of step or even worse completely in the dark.
The important thing is to remember that He loves us no matter where we are on our journey.
I just want to continue to share ideas about grief and life with people who long as I do for comfort and understanding.